No Oomph/ Halloween

Well, I am just spinning in circles today. I worked my ass off yesterday, and today, while metally motivated, I seem to have the attention span of a ferret on crack, and cannot seem to get anything accomplished. Yesterday, I dealt with the plumber, cleaned out, fixed the PayPal account, shopped, and made 19 gorgeous treat bags. Today, not so much! I am ready to crank up some iTunes and 'get r done'.

Tonight is Halloween, and the family is excited. My mom is coming to hand out candy while we take the kids through the neighborhood. We have tons of houses in our subdivision, but it's a very large subdivision....we will be taking the van around tonight. Plus, it will be warmer for all of us. So, I have to get the blacklight ready and finish putting out a few pumpkins. Tomorrow, I have to take it all down and put up all the Thanksgiving schtuff. Ah.... the life of a mom. Wish me luck!

Forty-nine on Me

1) when was the last time u went to the bathroom outside?

Peed outside with my mother and daughter all in a row, hiking up our nightgowns about five years ago.

2) When was the last time you saw one of your parents?

Thursday?


3) Which family member do you most resemble?
Lucky me- I'm Dad with a rack.

4) Do you wear cologne/perfume?

Everyday.

5) Do you wear deodorant?

Who says no?

6) Do you 'clean up nice'?

Yep!

7) When was the last time you tripped and fell?

About 10 months ago- fell while I was pregnant. So scary!

8) Where was the last place you spent from home?
Springfield, IL

9) What are you listening to right now?

The test of the Emergency Broadcast System!

10) Have you ever started an uncontrollable fire?

Not that I am aware of, Smokey.

11) Ever run out of gas on the road?

No, usually only men play that game.

12) Would you rather cut the grass or rake the leaves?

Mow the lawn- bagger picks up the leaves for me, anyway.

13) Your last name spelled backwards?

Hcaor

14) What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?

Nature screensaver with an Autumn theme

15) Last time you swam in a pool?

July(?)

16) Have you ever been in a school play?

First grade, I think. Barfed on stage.

17) How many kids do you want?

Pretty sure I'll just keep the three that I have.

18) Type of music you dislike most?

Rap where I cannot understand anything that is being said.


19) You registered to vote?

No, not since I moved.

20) You have cable?

Yes, it makes it easier to watch the Cubbies lose.


21) Ever prank call anybody?

Now, I have people do it for me.

23) Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?

No, I am not a thrill-seeker.

24) Do you have a garden?

Yes.

25) What's your favorite comic strip?

The Far Side

26) Bath or Shower, morning or night?

Bath at night- I just don't believe in going to bed without being edible

27) Best movie you've seen in the past two weeks?

Chronicles of Riddick

28) Favorite pizza topping?

Would you believe tomatoes?

29) Chips or popcorn?

Niether

30) What color lipstick do you usually wear?

red

31) Have you ever smoked?

uh....

32) Orange Juice or apple?

OJ

33) Favorite type of chocolate bar?

Just good and dark, beyond that I am not too fussy

34) When was the last time you voted at the polls?

2 years?

35) Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?

About six weeks....

36) Are you a good cook?

Yes, finally.

37) Ever order anything from an infomercial?

Yes

38) Sprite or 7-up?

Coke

39) Have you ever had to wear a uniform to work?

Yes

40) Ever thrown up in public?

Yes, see #16

41) Would you prefer being a millionaire or find true love?

Ask me some other day

42) Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, that's called lust.

43) Can ex's be friends?

Yes, but rarely.

44) Who was the last person you visited in a hospital?

My FIL

45) Did you have a lot of hair as a baby?

Some babies are bald?

46) What message is on your answering machine?

My polite, boring outgoing message

47) What do you think about most?

Tie- worrying about children/ wanting sex

48) Favorite form of travel?

The train was nice.

49) Ever drink rotten milk? Only by mistake.

Thanks for Thinking of Me????

Ok, so have you ever gone into your email inbox with your little cup of coffee, only to find that your inbox contains email that you find objectionable?

No, I am not taking about the occasional viagra offer I receive, or a bout of spam....I'm talking about things that loved ones send to me. Loved onnes, for crying our loud! If I can't trust you with my email, what CAN I trust you with?

This morning, it was a kick-ass prayer overheard in the Senate. Yeah, I pray that Missouri Medicaid will be fully reinstated, but I don't think we actually need to pray while the House is in session! And, how hypocrytical is that anyway????

"Lord, please give us the knowledge and wisdom to uphold your grace throughout this nation. All those in favor of closing the programs to benefit financially-disadvantaged wheelchair-bound children , say yea." I don't believe in school prayer, either, Mom. No one is stopping anyone from praying in school! You just can't have a group prayer (jesus) and/or sermon. And, I bet you damned well, that if some child brought his rug and asked which way was east, he'd be sent to the principal's office! Our average American school doesn't spend ten minutes studying Allah, and we sure aren't making fair and equal time. You want to hang a cross in my children's school? You'd better serve kosher meals in the cafeteria, as well! You can't hang the ten commandments in a courthouse- our laws are just that, ours. Dealing with the almighty is another goody bag altogether. God's never going to let you off with 6 months for kiddie porn.

My personal hated favorites are the ones with a prayer, and a crying Jesus, or a dancing Leprechun, that state I need to send this to all of my friends in 4 minutes, or 7 minutes, and my sins will be forgiven, or I will receive dancing Barbies on my computer screen, and a large sum of money. If I don't send it, my husband will die in a head-on collision with a tractor-trailor. The part that cracks me up, is that those are most often sent by my mother-in-law....why would she even take the chance???!??!??

A Blogilicious Treat

It's a rare moment that I actually "surf" the internet. I am most often searching for something, and I need an answer right away. But, recently I found about a full 25 minutes (across two days) to "surf" and I have three great blogs to share:

http://www.crazyauntpurl.com/
I emailed her once to ask her permission to rave about her blog. I never heard back. Not sure what to think of that, but whatever....

http://theofficialsiteofgrantmiller.blogspot.com/
This is fabulous!!!!, and updated regularly. And he led me to....

http://andsomeguysblog.blogspot.com/
this, which I have also deemed "worth time".

So, I am headed out tonight to meet a mom that I met online. She is not part of my group, but if she's cool, I'll give her the info. If not, she'll have to get lucky and find it herself.

Oh, and BTW- I just have to comment on Condi's comments yesterday morning when she essentially said, and I do not have time to QUOTE her, so I will just hammer out the jist of it, 'America has the capability and will use all of its resources, military and otherwise, to back Japan and our other new allies in this unsettling situation with N Korea'.

Really? What a joke? Did Japan laugh and shoot sake out of their noses? With what military force? We have generals reporting from the white house press core briefing room, stating we do not have the forces required to complete our "mission" in Iraq. (Think: necromongers- you keep what you kill). Ummm....maybe some of this can be traced to the whole "Axis of Evil" remarks? You think N Korea wants to start any conflicts? No, this is about his "honor" and the fact he feels threatened by a coke-snorting cowboy telling the world's terrorists to "Bring it On". Someone needs to send 'ol Kim a hummer, and a formal, written apology. Then the old man would chill out. Give him a mulligan after insulting the crap out of him in the world community. But for Condi to state that we have the military strength to sandbag a levy at this point is a laugh. We are going to draft the homeless next, if GW will have his way.

Can anyone else close their eyes right now and see GW changing his highschool transcripts from a D to a B in geometry and then repeatedly requesting to play "globalthermonuclearwar"?

"No? Ok,.... well then Joshua, how about a nice game of tic-tac-toe??????"

Beware- This Will Offend

Riiiiight. So, every day or so, or other minute, I hear or see something that is total bullshit. SO, as a disclaimer, let me point out that I love and admire people in all colors, forms, and from all walks of life. Except lazy bastards and liars. But, I think we've already established that, haven't we?

A couple of things, here really. There is always a damned good reason why a cliche is a cliche. If you've lived on this earth, you'll find it's true, regardless of how much your bleeding/liberal heart (like mine) struggles against believeing it. The phrase "dirty hippe" came to mind this morning, as I read abut how this woman washes her hair once a week. I don't know about you, but my hair would slide right off of my head. Don't tell me I only need to rinse it. I must also note that I am the type of person that only uses hair products for weddings and funerals. The fucking characters in Clan of the Cave Bear wash more than that, dude. That's not cool.

I also hate that someone that makes about a third or half of what we make, with 1/3 of the children that I have, tell me that I should cut back on my consumption. I don't believe in driving my brand-new H3 around town,but I have noticed that it's people with the least amount to do are the most opinionated. My father in law, god love him, is the most opinionated person I have EVER met. He's aware of this. He will also tell you he hasn't gotten much else to do. It's really easy to brag on your lack of consumption when you have less money to spend, and less to spend it on. What people don't realize is I buy almost NOTHING new, and I buy almost everything on clearance or for a hell of a bargin. I have to be cheap, I don't have that much to go around. No offense, but if you had two Volvos in the driveway, you wouldn't ride the fucking bus. Get real. It's almost impossible to live in step with our society, as well as with nature, because the two are getting farther apart every day. What keeps the two connected, unfortunately, is poverty. Ask just about anyone in Sri Lanka. We live in a fast-paced Big-Mac-your-ass sort-of-America, and if you want to not live that life, great, Mr. Thoreau- go to the woods because you wish to live deliberately. I admire that. I'm getting as close as I can to a simple life where I thank the heavens every day for the sky and my children, just another night in my husband's arms. Maybe it's just because I spend all that time cleaning my house and shaving my hoo-hoo that I don't have time to brag on my own righteousness.......

Paradise

Well, almost. My daughter is developing a rash, boys are asymptomatic so far, and I am swamped with docs, parmacies, and the like. But, I managed to take seven minutes or so and clean our back door and windows. Because THIS is what I see out of it.....

...and this is what I see inside....

I have a lot of work to do!

On a Roll- Get me to Vegas!

Well, the doc called yesterday, and although he totally pissed me off by giving me only 14 Ambien instead of 28, he did inform me that my heart won't explode!

Then, my new kitchen light arrived yesterday! About five minutes before my doc called! Lookie:

I found this on ebay! I wanted a light with a pot rack- we found one for $150 at Lowe's. Then, I did a random search the other night, and this had no bids, no watchers, a starting bid of $10, and 8 minutes to go! It absolutley matches what we're doing in the kitchen/family room area.As oyu can see, it's also brand new, never been used. I did a search before I bought it and the nearest comparable light was about $225, $250.....I am such a bargin whore!

So, I am going to live, and with new kichen lighting at that! I also started a meetup group for moms like myself. It's only been open three days and I have eighteen members! One of our members invited us all to her regular scrapbooking party that is at the end of each month. Frankly, I have never had any interest in scrapbooking, but wine, appetizers, and conversation are always right up my alley. I'll try anything once- that's why the boys love me!!!!

A Bit Too Much

I had to delete my pics of my enormous ass. I just couldn't take it anymore. I am facing my own mortality, waiting for these test results; and I just do not need to face my ass at the same time. Thanks for understanding and holding down your meal.

God, If You Get Me Out Of This, I Promise I'll Be Good.....

Today, I went for an ECG. This is test was deemed necessary based upon the results from my EKG last week. My doc think's part of my heart may be enlarged. I won't know anything for two weeks, except I have damage from smoking. I'm really scared. I want to curl up in my husband's arms and have him play with my hair and tell me eveything will be alright. And then it will be, right?

About Those Pics-

Yes, you can see the painting I am doing in the family room, and on the fireplace. Yes, I cut off my head in the middle one, as I was making funny faces at my son at the time....nothing worse than a chubby mom crossing her eyes and sticking out her tongue!