Spontaneous Thoughts From a Woman Who Misses Her Blog

Ugh. When will I blog again? I hate not having a phone line at my place, but there is no point in installing one now. We'll be gone in a month. Where? Nobody knows!

-My precious daughter started school yesterday. Big-time first-grader, she is. I was NOT allowed to walk her in to her new classroom, and meet her new teacher. Someone, anyone could see that she was with her mom, the very giver of life, and it would be ugh- "so embarrasing". I told her that maybe someone could even see me drop her off. I think at this point she actually asked me to slide down in my seat. I didn't really listen too hard, as I was puddling up by this point. I told her she didn't have to go- she could stay home with me. I could quit my job, we'd go on welfare, and she would end up as dumb as a box of rocks, but at least we'd be together, right? She didn't go for it. Damn. I am probably going to end up volunterring at her shool anyway, so she'll have her fill of embarassment before the year is over. You see, as the divorced, size-six single mother at the Catholic school, I am pretty much the Whore of Babylon to these suburban soccer moms. I thought perhaps if I bacame MORE involved, this would make life better for everyone. I am such a dumb shit.

-Note to my dearest....PLEASE REMOVE THE CUP BEFORE I WASH YOUR JOCK, OK?

-I am going through a major case of baby fever. I don't know what to do with that one. Now is not the time. C and I both know that. However, we are both oh-too-comfortable with the idea that "it could happen". We are looking forward to having a child within the next two years, but we both wanted to take the time to "make a baby". Perhaps that is how I will satisfy my craving. I will simply take a proactive approach, following E's example, and work on getting my body ready for the "baby making". The practice is always the best part, anyway!

-I am still having difficulty with the transition from single goddess to fully-committed goddess. I have been having a rough time with my CFS, and it has taken the wind out of my marital sails. I am not cooking as much as I had planned, but the house isbecoming so homey, and it's always immaculate. The laundry is finished, the animals are fed, the beds are made, the calander is full, the family is organized, and everything is perfect in general. Finding a new place is our next challange. Ugh. Baseball only lasts another week or so, thanks and praise. I love watching him play, don't get me wrong, but it's always a new injury and a late evening. This weekend, we are headed to Indiana, off to baseball playoffs with his best friends. We are taking along a couple from his team here at home, and it should be an entire weeknd of parties and games. This IS another big test, though- the best friend.